Nary a link for Third Quarter Moon

changes are afoot

Bloodroot is the best of the spring ephemerals as far as I am concerned. The flowers grow straight up and unfurl first, followed by their showy leaves. They get their name from the red sap in their stems. Ephemerals are the flowers that come out on the forest floor before sunlight is obscured by the leaves. They only last for a very short time. When I was little we’d all go out tromping along the edge of the muddy ravine and pick them until our hands were full. We didn’t know them as ephemerals then, we called them wild flowers. Grandma sent them home in baggies, their stems wrapped in wet paper towel so they’d last the 2 hour car ride.

Dear Righteous Reader,

I am so grateful that you are here.

We are circling on this planet together.

Here in Minneapolis we are getting rain and the world is greening around us. It’s palpable each spring when that canopy comes in and everything has the hue of fresh new growth. Josh and I took a walk as the rain began last night. The hawk was out hunting. The wood duck pair happily floating one after the other through the trees and high water. Something crossed our path, so fast that we couldn’t identify its grey blur. And at the end of the dock a single goose honking. Had it been away while the rest of the gaggle took shelter from the storm that was brewing?

This is the time of year that I see lots of ducks flying over my house. Sometimes in pairs, sometimes on their own. A duck in flight is not graceful to watch, they flap and quack hurling themselves in the direction they are going. Like joy and chaos taking to the sky. Such a welcome sight in spring.

The lilac will bloom this weekend, and the cherries too. And the rhubarb is big enough to pick. Shhh. Don’t tell the neighbor kids until after I make a pie.

And the dirt is dark and wet and it is an excellent time to move the rose bush and hydrangeas whose sunlight was an unfortunate casualty of the new sauna. Not to mention the hostas that have been on my list for several years now.

As the world adorns itself with foliage and flowers, I wonder, is this enough to ease the emotional exhaustion?

I find that the nature, the rain, the new world teeming with life, recharges me and helps me stay grounded.

But I may need some more tools in order to solve a life that has changed this much even though many of the details remain the same.

Last fall I planned to put myself into new professional contexts, and upon making this commitment, I got an email from the Minnesota Humanities Center about their grant opportunities. I hoped to receive the funding for a new journal project, and it meant pivoting, investing time in another new thing with a big learning curve, to spend time and energy to develop a plan for something that I wouldn’t have the money to complete if I didn’t have the grant. I took the risk.

While I was working on the grant, while Karlene was encouraging and helping me, her cancer spread through her liver and she went into liver failure. She died on Winter Solstice, the shortest day of the year.

By the time of Karlene’s service in February, the Minnesota Humanities Center had notified all applicants that the number of grants applications had exceeded their expectations and they were updating their timelines. On March 21, I got notice that my grant wasn’t awarded. The news, while not unexpected, was deflating.

In the meantime, there has been plenty going on, we are fixing up the house after all, doing our estate planing, helping my mother-in-law move, keeping my trail legs, processing loss, living the life.

I don’t know what is next yet but I feel like it might be around the corner.

Last year at this time we had just completed my mom’s memorial service. And like this year, I was looking ahead to a spring and summer season of travel. Last year Josh and I took a month to head west for a family reunion in Washington. This year we will be traveling again, abroad to London for a short one, and at home Vistabule Teardrop camping with a few ventures out to the BWCA and longer to Wyoming.

I have been in a liminal space for a long time now but I have been holding tight to my moon posts, and now it is time to let go and pivot again.

I will take a break from my moon schedule. I will continue to create paid content with preview updates for everyone. You can expect to hear from me once a month and be back in force by September, just in time for the election.

In the meantime, the world still turns and we have to take care of ourselves to be part of how it changes. And from one righteous person to another, our biggest strength is our stamina. So take the time to pace yourself, to neither push too hard, nor back off entirely, and if you find you are burned out, please let me know and let’s talk.